Blog - July Overview

Hi Blog,

As I reflected on all these thoughts, I realised something deeper. Perhaps my struggle was never truly about wanting to be handsome, taller, or more attractive. Those were simply the things I believed would bring me closer to something else — the feeling of being wanted, chosen, and desired.

Maybe we do not long for beauty itself. Maybe we long for what we think beauty can give us.

After spending much of my life single, I have often wondered if things would have been different had I looked better. Would I have received more attention? More opportunities? Would someone have looked at me differently? These thoughts still visit me from time to time. Not because I dislike who I am today, but because there remains a small part of me that wishes to know what it feels like to be desired by another person.

Yet as the years pass, I have also come to understand that attraction alone cannot carry a relationship through life. Good looks may capture attention, but they cannot guarantee kindness, loyalty, understanding, or companionship. Beauty may open a door, but it is character that decides whether someone stays. The older I grow, the more I appreciate thoughtful hearts, genuine souls, and people who make others feel safe to be themselves.

Blog - May Overview

Hi Blog,

As I grew older, those quiet thoughts didn’t disappear. They simply became softer, more hidden — showing up in small moments. A glance at someone more confident, a passing comparison, or even just the feeling of being unnoticed in a crowd. I told myself I had accepted things, but deep down, something still lingered.

Sometimes, it’s not loud insecurities that stay with us… but the quiet ones we learn to live with.

I began to realise that it wasn’t just about how I looked, but how I believed others would see me. That belief slowly shaped how I carried myself — more reserved, more careful, sometimes holding back before even trying. Not because I couldn’t, but because a part of me had already decided where I stood.

Blog - June Overview

Hi Blog,

This June began unexpectedly: my left ear became muffled for more than a week. At first, I thought it would go away, but it persisted until I saw a doctor. He explained that it was earwax impaction. I started the treatment and gradually adjusted to being half-deaf. As strange as it sounds, the silence in one ear forced me to listen more deeply to myself.

It reminded me of how I sometimes respond to the advice of others—half-listening. Not because I do not care, but because I know exactly what changes I need to make. What holds me back is how people frequently rush to judgement rather than trying to understand. I am tired of being labelled as negative simply because I open up. Maybe what I’m really asking for is not answers but trust and space to grow at my own pace.

I discovered that something as simple as a blocked ear can serve as a mirror for self-awareness. I do not always need to "fix" things right away. Sometimes I just need to be patient with myself, accept my flaws, and make room for quiet healing. If others don’t understand, that’s okay—what matters is that I am beginning to understand myself.

Blog - April Overview

Hi Blog,

Time passes, but some feelings linger. Even though life moves forward, my mind occasionally drifts back to a friendship that left me feeling both betrayed and disappointed. It wasn’t a heated argument, nor was it a dramatic fallout—just a moment, a shift, a distance that grew between us. Looking back, I ask myself: was I too sensitive, or did I simply expect too much? Maybe it was a small matter, but sometimes, the smallest moments reveal the biggest truths.

It all began with a trip, where things seemed fine until they weren’t. A conversation about life choices—where to live, what freedom means—led to a wall of silence I never saw coming. I thought this friend understood me, yet his coldness after that session felt like a quiet storm.

After we returned from the trip and he departed with a cold wave without a word... Months passed without a word, and when he finally reached out, I found myself unable to respond with the warmth I once had. I didn’t want to be angry, but I couldn’t ignore the weight of the ghosting during and after either. Perhaps time will mend what was lost, or maybe it has already shown what was never truly there. I don’t want to hold grudges, but I do hold onto lessons. And if this experience has taught me anything, it’s that silence speaks louder than words—both his and mine.

Blog - November Overview

Hi Blog,

November is already one of my busiest seasons, and I will not be able to explore much, but I will try. I update my overview posts more regularly or daily than my long posts.

I guess blogging is a way of healing for me.

This is the best way to treat this blog as my personal cyberspace where I can reflect on random stupid things from time to time.

Blog - September Overview

Hi Blog,

As September begins, I’ve been reflecting on the feelings of doubt and underachievement that have been weighing on my mind—like concerns about my physical fitness, the challenges of finding time to work out, and the pressure of not having started a romantic relationship. These doubts can really get to me sometimes, pulling me into a negative space. But with some help from ChatGPT, supportive friends, and years of trying to be a better version of myself, I’ve noticed that I’ve actually made some improvements. They’re not huge or overnight changes, but they’re there, and they matter.

It’s important to acknowledge that I’m doing the best I can with the time I have. My schedule is packed, and I still dedicate myself to things that matter, like spending time with family, and friends, and fulfilling my duties. That’s not nothing—it’s significant. And I have to remember that fitness isn’t just about looking a certain way; it’s about feeling good and being healthy. While having a relationship is a great experience, everyone’s timeline is different. Instead of focusing on what I haven’t achieved, I’m learning to focus on being the best version of myself and doing things that make me feel fulfilled and happy—like hobbies, volunteering, or self-improvement

What I’m learning is that progress doesn’t have to be a big deal to count. Even little steps—like accepting where I am with my fitness and staying open to the idea of love—are worth celebrating. I have to remember to give myself some credit. As I keep moving forward, I’ll try to focus more on the good stuff, be patient with myself, and embrace the slow and steady path of personal growth. Here’s to making September a month of growth, self-compassion, and positivity.

Blog - January Overview

Happy 2024 Blog and exclusive readers

Thanks for supporting and liking my humble blog, 2023 was a happening year, there were bad and good moments especially my emotions and people who turned colder... but never mind, it was nothing new and if that is how he/she wants to be, I will respect that.

While looking back all the promises that person had made and I allowed it to happen, is totally my own fault. Blame no one than myself for giving that seat in my heart to them.

Anyway, time to move on and continue to improve on making myself less boring perhaps.

Blog - September Overview

Hi Blog,

Sorry that I didn't have any long posts to keep you updated I was setting up the 2nd Blog that focuses on my hiking and Urbex journeys with less of my stupid face and thought (discounted posts); and any personal related posts, I will keep it here. You can find my 2nd Blog here or the buttons above.

To my exclusive readers, thank you for your love and support; and I hope you will interact with me often by throwing some feedback on my posts.

So what do I have for September? It will be typical stuff that I do; nothing new or perhaps I will bring my waifu out more often if I am not hiking.

Blog - June Update

Hi Blog,

Have been procrastinating for a while... Took some time to reflect on why I procrastinated.

In some ways... I am stuck in a loop and I want to improve but I know I can't be the best when most people and even myself will expect me to be the best... Why you don't strike for the best, you are not working on it at all...

Why... Need to go for the best? Can't we go for good or better? Isn't good or better not good enough? Perhaps it is a trigger...

Blog - May Update

Hi Blog,

May The May a blessing to my soul. I just wanted to calm down further... Recently, I got a bit negative and somehow numb inner.

Hope I will enhance and cultivate the Zen in me.

Sigh... I need to be watchful with myself. May the force be with me.

Blog - December Update

Hi Blog,

Wow! December! As compared to other years, this year, it seemed like I have lesser posts... I might need some time to revisit my usual hiking places... But I doubt anyone will want to read the same old things again.

Feel bounded this time around, perhaps lack of ideas...

Anyway, it is a diary for me; I will take it easy and hope next year will be a good one.

Cycling - To Hampstead

Good Morning Blog,

ZN wanted to go for a ride and asked me to find a place. I thought through... ZN doesn't have a bike of his own but he claimed he can rent the public bike. Seriously?

Since he was so confident about it so we will ride early to wake Mr Sun.

Besides catching the sun rise, I also wanted to cover one place... That is Hampstead Wetland Park.

Cycling - Wake Mr Sun Up

Good Morning Blog,

Yawning... Today's post will be a short one. I didn't have proper sleep because I woke up every single hour or even every 15 mins... I just worried that I might oversleep...

Ended up, I only slept a few hours, and since I had promised to meet up Wy.

Wy is the lady who drew a Merlion head cycling track together with us. She stays quite near me and wanted to cycle together, so I have to uphold my promise.

Cycling - Full Servicing and Tubeless Conversion

Hi Blog,

Collected back one of the short posts on the 26th of May. I decided to bring my waifu for full servicing and a tubeless conversion with Kylene.

Time to find Kylene :)

In my past posts on visiting Kylene for my waifu's issues, he has been very helpful to provide his assistance to look at my waifu. You can read up more here when I started my first visit and recent visit, upgrade (2017) and return (2017). Last time, my tyres were not made for tubeless setup and I changed to new tyres at 3Rcycle (2019) and now it was tubeless-suitable so let make it tubeless!

Blog - February Update

Hi Blog,

February! CNY is coming! Am I looking forwards for CNY?!... Laughed bitterly. Anyway, Life still goes on. I am just looking forwards to going oversea! Meanwhile, let's hope for a better 2021 for everyone.

I decided to make some changes to my Monthly Update post, I will park all my workouts here together with my randomness; any longer post will be a standalone post on its own.

Blog - January Update

Happy 2021 Blog!

Wow! We were moving towards our 11th year of my blogging life. Long ways to go. So may happening stuff in the past.

It has never been easy but I will try to conquer.

Hopefully, for 2021, I will get better and thanks to Google for not putting a storage space limit capped at certain GB. My blog itself is confirmed MORE than what was given for free.

Cycling - All for a Staghorn

Good morning Blog,

Previous Mr E, my colleague, wanted to cycle a longer distance but failed due to rain. Today it seemed like it is the day to achieve that but I had a plan for today too.

Insert Holy music while staring at the Mr Sun. Filled with hopes and hopes to wash my unhappiness away.

As the title stated, yes! While cycling to a far distance, I will want to collect a staghorn from the west to feed my new addiction. Thanks Goodness Mr E agreed!

Cycling - December Rides

Hi Blog,

Yippee! A MONTH of SCHOOL HOLIDAY started! NO students and lesser colleagues!

Hi my waifu, lets go for a ride!

Yes! I can cycle to my workplace and burn my fat. I will try to wear and rotate all my cycling jersey and added a label tag with it.

Blog - October Update

Hi Blog,

It is OCTOBER! Time flies! You have been accompanying me for years and thanks for shining the days and nights in my life. I could remember there was a moment when I decided not to blog anymore... deep in my heart, I really really missed it a lot. :) So I continue blogging. Hope you will like it.

Cycling - Four Days with my Waifu

Hi Blog,

This weekday Monday to Thursday were days when my workplace will be at a quiet state which meant I can cycle to work! :D YES! Save some money! I decided to give myself a mini-challenge to cycle for these four days if the weather is good. :) Boringness warning.

On 19th Oct 2020 - Mr Sun raised its arm and pulled the trigger, and the challenge began!