Blog - February Overview

Hi Blog,

Chinese New Year has always felt different from the Western New Year. It carries less urgency and more reflection — a pause to look at what has stayed, what has faded, and what quietly follows us into the next cycle of life.

I had to reflect on what I want to do in life.

Now, close to 50, I no longer wait for dramatic changes in my relationship status. Looking back at my 30s and where I am today, I can’t tell whether I truly outgrew that longing or whether I numbed myself for so long that it felt like growth. Perhaps it doesn’t matter anymore. What matters is that I’ve learned to accept it. Instead of letting these unfulfilled hopes become stones that slow me down or injure me, I choose to turn them into stepping stones — a way to cross the river towards the place I’m meant to reach.

Personal - Swimming Theme #20

Hi Blog,

I’ve realised something about myself — even though I’m slowly learning to recognise my patterns and triggers, I still struggle when people put the spotlight on me. Compliments, comments about being good-looking, or being fit… I just can’t receive them well. It doesn’t feel like they belong to me.

I always feel those words should go to the “demigods” out there — the confident ones with the right build, the right genes, the natural presence. They wear that armour of confidence so easily. I don’t. When the spotlight hits me, my instinct is to retreat into the shadows.

I’m not afraid of hard work. I just don’t want to stand on a stage where every flaw feels magnified. Even models need photographers to hide or adjust imperfections — so what about someone like me, with my ordinary looks and weak spots? It’s hard not to imagine people looking with judgement or disapproval.

Personal - Suits for the Theme #119

Hi Blog,

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on what it means to take initiative at work. I used to believe that seeing a gap and stepping in to help was always a good thing—and in many ways, it still is. But over time, I’ve started to realise that helping without clarity can slowly blur boundaries. What begins as support can quietly turn into responsibility, and before I notice it, the task no longer feels temporary or shared.

When initiative turns into ownership, and silence becomes agreement.

In a school environment, there are many moments where things need to be done quickly to avoid disruption. When no one steps forward, I often do—not because it is my duty, but because I care about quality, students, and outcomes. However, when others acknowledge a task but do not act, and I eventually complete it, the system learns something: “This is already taken care of.” Over time, that support becomes expected. Asking for help or clarity later can feel like shouting into the void, and raising concerns may unintentionally be seen as complaining, even when the intention is sustainability and fairness.

Personal - Bus Over The Border Together

Hi Blog,

In 2024 and 2025, I mentioned that one of my wishlists was to travel with colleagues, because it can help build memories besides work and also means they are comfortable and enjoy travelling together. The same rules applied with friends.

Today was the day to continue building good memories with my colleagues.

Traveling can really test an individual's character when they aren't carrying job professionalism and politeness, bringing out their actual personality and social awareness, especially in a group. Also, it is a test for myself too.

Product - Spiderman Costume from Unibuyplus

Hi Blog,

This is a kind of late post that I took a few weeks to draft. Based on the title, yes, I went and bought another Spider-Man suit. This one will be my last because of the high-quality fabric. I wish I could afford the best Spider-Man suit, which costs around $1k, but so far I haven't had a chance to wear it...

Oh well, I bumped into this website, Unibuyplus, and it has an affordable Spiderman Suit. It is not customisable, so I have to risk it. Based on my height, I should go for S, but I am too big for S, so M will be the size to go for.

Anyway, money has been spent, and goods have arrived. Let's see how the suit looks.