Swimming - Swimming with E and K

Hi Blog,

About nearly two years that we have not gathered to engage in an activity together... due to our residential location different, different lifestyle and age gap etc etc. (my inferior complexity kicked in too)

Swim at Tampines Swimming Pool

Testing my camera like six years ago where we had fun together when I had my life proof casing.

The fat me and two slim fishes.

two handsome young men, any taker?

No taker? If I am in the picture, you might consider :D

Let's compare my fat with theirs.

V-shape with good gene and  handsome Elvis, trying to create bubbles.

Trying to create perfect bubbles

I failed as usual.

Just smile.

Yippee! Kavan managed to create a bubble ring!

The water distortion really making funny stuff out of Elvis.
Looked like he was naked in the water! Hahahah

Under water shot is interesting but not low enough...
to think again... like this is better, don't want my fat tummy disgusts your sight.

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Thought of the Experience

My inferior complexity kicked in everytime... like Many moments I feel envious over them - slim and rigged tapered bodies, not just them but others too... the feeling of owning something which make us feel good of ourselves. (That's why many hitting the gyms and stuff themselves with whey & proteins) I feel so useless of myself, like shame for my family.... especially when I am still single, undesirable and unworthy... bad genes... no wonder I am still alone... I should not pollute the great genes pool with mine.

Nobody-person like me, desire to be somebody like living in higher ground - get rich, good life, envied by others, successful and attractive, some even want to be desirable by others. All those are distant away from me like electrons... I Guess when come to achievements; I have nothing to show - not attractive, shxtty genes, not great body, not wealthy, not great job etc etc. All those haunt me  for years and causing me to feel inferior with others.

I know what you are thinking right now when you are reading (if there is even any).... you will tell me to work hard for it, change my lifestyle, do more workouts, spare more time to find a more prosperous job, be confident and make my genes work for me etc

But to think back.... this strong reminder hit me Long time ago while I depressed - "the world does not revolve around me."

Looking back those stuff which made me depressed, are things which I am hoping for. Just like hoping for more electrons surrounding me. But I have completely forgotten that the nucleus (the core of me) where neutrons and photons are the main issues I should work on.

Inside me, my photon (desire) is so great but not enough electrons to neutralise/balance it; that's why I feel imbalance or unstable. Look at my surrounding - there are many common people like me (yes there are some good and possess whatever good fate/genes whatever) they live a normal life like me. When This statement "the world doesn't revolve around me", what I am thinking or craving is a selfish thought.

Just re-look at those desirable things I want, are materialistic and superficial. Those aren't to last, just like electrons, those will break lose from the core.

So what matter is how I adjust my core (desire) by reducing the number of photons and neutrons; manage my expectation. The lesser number of the nucleus is, the lighter I can become, less desire for superficial stuff, I will be happy.

OOps I guess I wrote too much.... Well, it is my thought process... on my inferior complexity... Yes the world doesn't revolve around me, I will learn to live for others and myself.

I just have to be strong

Thumb up for me... Jia you Jeff

Jeff