I’ve often noticed how compliments light up certain people — especially those who seem to shine like demigods. Their confidence, their looks, their achievements — everything they do seems to attract admiration. Some even grow stronger with each praise, as if the applause fuels them. And others expect me to respond the same way — to receive compliments with a big smile, to feel proud and encouraged. But to be honest, outward validation feels... tempting yet strangely hollow to me. It brushes against my skin but doesn’t sink deep. It feels like a mask I don’t quite wear.
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| Do I need shiny armour to prove my worth, or is there something else within me trying to speak? |
This thought brings me to the idea of the “shiny armour” versus the “inner light.” The shiny armour is what people can easily see — appearance, charm, success, and humour. The inner light is quieter — it’s values, compassion, purpose, and resilience that others might not notice at first. As an INFJ and someone with a strong Earth influence in my Ba Zi, I tend to seek meaning behind actions, not just results. I’m wired to look deeper — to question, to reflect, to serve — and that sometimes means I’m slow to accept praise that feels surface-level. I don’t reject compliments because I am not comfortable with them. I reject them when they feel disconnected from my core — or when I haven’t yet lived up to the person I want to be.
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When people say kind things about me, I often reflect: "Is this truly me? Or just what they see?" My childhood, my quiet personality, and life experiences taught me to measure myself against inner truth more than outside praise. Sometimes, this makes me miss out on encouragement. Other times, it keeps me grounded. It's a lifelong balancing act.
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| In the end, whether this nature is shaped by fate or formed through conscious self-cultivation, it brings me back to a bigger question — what do I want to be remembered for? Not for how many compliments I received. But maybe for the quiet strength I carried when no one was looking. For the light I tried to keep alive — even if it wasn’t shining for show. |
Jeff
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