Personal - INFJ Sharing Secrets with Others

Good morning Blog,

Today was my leave and wanted to go for an island trip but... never mind. I decided to go for a short hiking and catch up session with Q. It will be some of my usual hiking trip and I took some time to observe how I share my secrets with others... Will explain more later.

Gloomy weather today, lucky I didn't go for suntan.

Woke up early so that we can end today simple hike. Today post, I was wondering, as an INFJ, do I share secrets to others?

Most INFJs are quite private and reserved. Just like me... I will have a strict category of what I will share and whom I am sharing with, especially about personal stuff. I am actually love and enjoy sharing with myself (like here in my blog) and some important things will stay hidden.

Like a cat, cat is mysterious and not as expressive as dog.

While waiting for Q to arrive, I was thinking... Have I even shared my story to anyone? Actually I do and quite frequently.

But I will be selective.

Q had arrived and we started to enter to MacRitchie. Q has not been hiking or visited MacRitchie for a long time.

Back to the topic, I tend to spill some of my life story to strangers whom I just met and acquaintance. Like I have no problem sharing but when comes to deeper things... I highly doubt I will share with anyone randomly.

Even to my family and friends, I will keep most things to myself, especially to those who can't or unwillingly to understand different perspectives

Only a few selected individuals whom I trust my emotions and feelings, and only those who went through a lot of tests and building of trust then I will open up to them.

Even my mother will blame me for not telling her enough about me but to be honest... Why that happened is due to one way traffic communication; examples: She will never understand the joy of me when I am hiking, when I read online diary, why I like to take pictures, why I keep quiet etc etc

Usually we will wait for the right person patiently... (It can be anyone and not just GF) I keep private with my friends and family and keep my feelings and emotions to myself, and will be selective to strangers.

But you may say that am I contradiction myself? I mentioned I tend to spill my life story to strangers whom I just met, then why I need to be selective and so opened on sharing?

I think mostly when I ranted to anyone about my life problems, I understand that I might scare a lot of people away... as not everyone wants to listen or taking my shxt, I don't blame them.

Then why I am doing that? I will do this as an unconscious effort to see their reactions like how they provide suggestions, and how closed or open-minded they are.

Hmmm... It seemed like a quiet place and perfect for me to spider visit here :D before it starts functioning. Oh back to topic!

The main reason will be, If I share my feelings to people I trust, and they respond well and trying to understand my feelings and the situation, and then providing solutions tailoring to my feeling. I will share more with them as I know they are welcomed to another deeper layers of me. If I share my feelings to people who are closed minded, and they will tell me that I’m being illogical etc etc. I will limit my sharing and be a listening ear.

(Thanks Q for helping) And I got knocked down by the orange van. Hahaha. Anyway back to topic, But I would not share with those type of people in the first place, knowing the type of person they are because I had “studied” them. As we are disgusted of sharing with shallow people and we will be happy to share with people whom we consider to be deep enough to deserve it.

I didn't shot properly as I need to hurry my footsteps and Q was tired.

What have I learned from my revising myself... I wouldn't mind to be a listener to everyone. But sometimes it hurts a little to know that I try to listen, be engaged and not interrupt someone's story, but on the other hand realising that it is difficult to find a good listener for myself.

Sharing with myself should be the safest, most comfortable, satisfying, relaxing and adventurous thing I might experience.

So... Perhaps, sharing my personal matter with others is not wrong. Just need to control some content and don't make it into a ranting, venting mode which might turn anyone off. A lot to learn and hope for the best, prepare for the worst.

Jeff